For today's post I just have a few thoughts on failure. As a scientist, my life is full of it. I constantly have to dust off and try again. It's how science is done and how we are all successful. If you can't learn from failure and bounce back from it, then science is not for you. I say this having been brought pretty emotionally low by failure at times. Here are three failure stories for you:
Story #1
I haven't introduced the glove box yet, but perhaps I will do that on Friday. For the moment, I will ask you to imagine a large, enclosed chamber that is free of oxygen so that we can do experiments with air-sensitive materials. We use sulfide in the glove box, which will destroy the electronics inside unless we scrub the sulfide from the glove box atmosphere. To do this, we constantly bubble the glove box atmosphere through a solution containing dissolved silver. The sulfide reacts with the silver, forming black, highly insoluble silver sulfide. Recently we got a new source of silver, silver nitrate. Having worked with silver during my PhD, I know what a pain in the neck this element can be because it is photosensitive. This means that upon exposure to light, dissolved silver is reduced to silver metal and precipitates from solution. Not so good for scrubbing sulfide from the glove box. One way to keep the silver in solution is to add hydrochloric acid. However, I wasn't sure that I wanted hydrochloric acid floating around the glove box destroying the electronics either, so I left it out. I made the silver nitrate solution in water, covered the glass bottle with foil to keep out as much light as possible, stuck the bottle in the glove box, and hoped for the best. Here is the result:

Yeah, that didn't work. So my job tomorrow is to find another way to make the silver nitrate solution. This is just a small example, but it illustrates nicely that many times, there is no recipe for me to follow. There is no formula or predetermined answer to a problem. So we (scientists) try things, make it up as we go along, and when something doesn't work, we back up and try again. On a creepier note, I discovered as a graduate student working with silver that colloidal silver is touted on the internet as a magic cure-all. People actually drink it, which leads to
argyria. The pictures are pretty weird. And by the way, the condition is not reversible. Don't drink colloidal silver.
Story #2
I have submitted three papers as first author. They've all been rejected at some point. My first paper took two years to get published. I am still working on revising the other two so that I can resubmit them. Now, getting rejected is par for the course--it happens to everyone. But I am getting tired of having my papers rejected. However, there is nothing else that I can do except revise and try again. Eventually they will get published.
Story #3
I confess that I dropped out of graduate school the first time. I thought I wanted to be a chemist. But after two years, things weren't going well and I didn't like the work I was doing. Dejected, I took a leave of absence for a year to consider my options. After much thought, I decided that I did want to finish graduate school, and that I had truly enjoyed the geology class that I had taken a year earlier. Why not switch departments? So I threw myself 100% into getting into the geology PhD program and somehow it all worked out. It was the best career decision I ever made and I have never looked back. I love my work as a geochemist now. But deciding to quit graduate school the first time was agonizing and left me with a lot of uncertainty in my life. It also amounted to losing a job and I have spent years grappling with the financial consequences. Moreover, it stretched out my time in graduate school from 5 to 8 years.
I wouldn't recommend this path through graduate school to anyone. For me it couldn't have happened any other way, and if it's the right decision then you have to go for it. My dual life as a geologist and a chemist has been an academic strength. Life seems not to move in straight lines and you have to keep getting up and trying again.